Blind Love
by VergebungInAlle
Summary: It has been moons after the great battle with the Dark Forest and the Clans have prospered since than. However, one cat has been bitter since the prophecy has been completed and the only thing that can help him might be against the code he always meant to stand for. Featuring Jayfeather and Briarlight.
1. Chapter 1

The sun's rays flickered through the dark, grey clouds; faintly lighting up the camp's clearing. Few cats basked in the sunlight trying to grab the last of its rays before the clouds finally swallowed it up. Jayfeather laid his body partially sticking out of the den; he was resting his head on his fore leg, bored. There wasn't much to do now that the dark forest was finally beaten. The clans seemed to be at an everlasting peace with the dark forest dismantled after their lost. Life was hardly exciting anymore, few cats ever came to the den for any treatment, and if they did it was usually for something extremely minuscule such as a splinter in the paw or finding ticks. And now that the prophecy was fulfilled, there wasn't anything to work towards or anything to discover. Life would go on normally, nothing new, no more adventures. And it made him feel useless now.

Not that he felt that he wasn't important anymore to the clan, but it seemed like he didn't matter anymore to the clan outside his medicine cat duties. _This is so dull! _Jayfeather thought angrily. _These aren't duties that a medicine cat should be doing, I should be healing wounds or fever not removing splinters for cats too stupid to pay attention to where they were going!_

The only thing that came slightly above the normality of clan life was Briarlight, as she required special treatment for her chest infection. He had to make sure every day that she was getting the proper exercises and stretches to keep her healthy and, hopefully, fight off the infection. She was also a great help around the den, helping him sort out the herbs and other necessities for the den. She even knew how to heal minor cuts and wounds. But her back legs greatly hindered her in gathering the herbs and plants, so it was usually up to him to gather the plants. However, she was able to keep him company in the usually lonely den.

He listened as she dragged herself towards where he was lying, her breathing slightly labored. He turned his blind blue eyes onto her, "Are you okay?" He meowed, even though he knew how she would already answer.

"I'm fine," she replied, slightly annoyed, "Why are you trying to be my mother or something?"

Mille, Briarlight's mother, was over protective of her ever since the accident and every day she came into the medicine cat den and fretted over her. She thought she was helping her, trying to cater to her every need, but in reality it actually made her feel worthless, a burden to the clan. Which she wasn't, at least not to him, she was a great help around the den and, as much as he wouldn't accept it, she was a great friend and companion. She was able to fight off the feeling of loneliness, which had been following Jayfeather ever since his mother, Leafpool, became a warrior after revealing her forbidden affair with Crowfeather, a cat from a different clan. Sure, he had his brother, but he was usually too busy providing for the clan with his warrior duties, and would only be able to spend time with him for a short while. Now, he even spent less time with him because his mate, Cinderheart, a grey tabby she-cat, was pregnant with his kits and he fussed over her every need, which Jayfeather knew was annoying her.

"No, I was just asking," He meowed, not trying to frustrate her, "I'm just doing my duty."

"Whatever," she meowed in reply, "Anyway," she continued, changing the subject, "Beautiful day isn't it?"

"Yeah," Jayfeather snorted, "If you count rain as something beautiful," he meowed, remembering the time when he was still an medicine cat apprentice trapped in the tunnels running underneath Thunderclan, trapped while the underground river swarm, threatening to drown him, his brother, sister, Heathertail, Breezepelt, and a pair of Windclan kits, who were the reason they were in the tunnels in the first place. They had found it after spotting Lionblaze and Heathertail secretly meeting in them at night. They had all nearly drowned that day and since then he has had a small fear of water.

"Why are you so negative, Jayfeather!" she meowed, frustrated at his bitterness at everything.

"You'd be negative too if you could never see anything," he meowed angrily, "the constant unending darkness, never being able to see anything. I didn't even want to be a medicine cat; I was forced by my disability to be one!"

"You have to look for the positives in life, Jayfeather," Briarlight replied, trying her best to diffuse the situation and calm him down.

But it was too little avail, his fur rising and claws sliding in and out quickly. "What would you know?" he growled, "You've need had to deal with the dark or the feeling of loneliness, you always had family there for you! You never really had to deal with any dark secrets kept by the ones who are supposed to be dear to you!"

_"So much bitterness," a voice said in his head, "Only a loving embrace can fix such anger."_

Jayfeather stood up and shook his blind gaze around the den. The voice sounded so familiar, but he couldn't quite put his paw on where he had heard it before. "Did you hear that?" he asked Briarlight, hoping she may have heard it as well and could help him determine the owner of it.

"Oh, I heard it Jayfeather," Briarlight said, anger and sadness mixed into her meow. "And I see how you feel about your family and… and me!" she cried angrily. Rising onto her front legs, "I'm leave you be because you like your loneliness so!"

"Wait! What?" he meowed quickly, but too little avail, as she dragged her way through the crack in the rock that led into and out of the den. He listened, mouth a gap, as she continued to drag her way through the middle of the clearing and towards the fresh-kill pile. _What did I do?_

"_You drove her further away." _

"Who are you and where are you!" Jayfeather said aloud, still trying to pin-point the mysterious voice.

_"Oh, Jayfeather it surely hasn't been that long that you've forgotten me now?" _

"Show yourself then!"

A compact, white she-cat, with dark green eyes appeared before him. "Oh, Jay Wing, how I've missed you," she purred happily.

"Half- Half Moon," Jayfeather meowed in surprise. He wasn't sure rather to be shocked at the fact that he could see her or that she was even in the den in the first place. He hadn't seen her since the battle with the dark forest, and why she was doing here now was confusing to him, but that didn't bother him now. He was just happy to be seeing her right now. "I thought you had forgotten about me."

She rubbed her muzzle against his, "I never could forget about you, Jay's Wing," she purred, slightly amused, "I said I'll always wait for you."

"Yeah, but you didn't come to me in any dreams lately and I thought you had forgotten me," Jayfeather replied, returning her affection. "Why didn't you appear to me?"

Half Moon's face became suddenly grim and almost appeared heartbroken. Her deep, dark green eyes closed half way and sadness radiated off her star covered pelt. She licked Jayfeather's ear swiftly before backing away from him, until she stood a fox-length away from him.

"What's wrong, Half Moon?" Jayfeather asked, confused at her sudden change of temperament. _She was just happy a moment ago, so does she seem so depress now? _

"I can't come see you anymore," she meowed after a moment's hesitation.

Jayfeather's heart stopped and his brain stopped processing common thoughts, though it seemed to be working enough for him to continue to breathe normally. His thoughts were all jumbled up into one big concoction of gibberish; it was almost like his brain completely went insane from the words spoken by Half Moon; it felt like he was going insane. Finally, he was able to get it back under control, however; her words still struck deep into his mind. "What?" Jayfeather choked out, finally able to speak.

"I'm sorry, Jay's Wing," she meowed sadly, "but with me in your thoughts it prevents you from being able to fix yourself."

"What do you mean?"

"There is another who loves you," she meowed, staring him directly into his blind blue eyes.

Jayfeather stared at her, his eyes widen and mouth slightly opened. _There's no way anyone in the clan could love me! _He thought unhappily, _I'm a medicine cat for Starclan's sake! It's forbidden for me or anyone else to fall in love with me! _But he couldn't sense any discreet in her voice and why would she try to lie to him? She loved him, so why would she tell him if there was someone else who felt the same.

"Why are you telling me this?" Jayfeather inquired, hoping that, in fact, she was only playing a horrible joke on him. That she was only messing with him. But her blank face showed no signs of falsehood or humor.

"Because, Jay's Wing," she meowed, sadly, her eyes drooping, "I went to see you happy.

"But I'm happy when you're around," Jayfeather whined, sounding like a new-born kit, but he didn't care, he only wanted to know why she was saying all this.

She grimaced slightly at his words, almost like there was another cat's claws cutting into her. She frowned and blinked her eyes sadly at him. "I can't keep coming to see you, Jay's wing," she meowed, "I am only an artifice to your true happiness and I'm dead, Jay Wing, we won't be reunited until your passing, and Starclan still has a long life planned for you."

"I can wait," he meowed, regaining some of his previous composure, but still sounding like he could break out into the shrill crying of a kit any moment.

She shook her head, the muscles in her shoulders straining under her fur, "That's the problem, Jay's Wing; I want you to be happy now, not until you die. I want you to long for living, not longing for your time to come." Half Moon meowed. Closing her eyes, "That's why this will most likely be one of our last meetings together."

"But I need you," Jayfeather meowed weakly.

"It will seem that way for a while," she replied, "but when you fall in love again, you'll forget about the pain from this meeting."

"But medicine cats can't fall in love," he meowed, fixing his gaze on her, "It's against the code."

"Do you think I care about the code?" She growled so furiously that even Jayfeather flinched a little. Shaking her head to regain her composure, she continued: "I only want to see you happy and no code is going to get in the way of that. It's where your heart lies and not a code written many moons a go."

Jayfeather found himself at a loss of words. He couldn't believe what he was hearing; betray his own set of morals for love? And this was Half Moon telling him this, the cat who loved him, but here she was telling him to love this unknown cat to fix himself. Fix himself from what?

"You're bitter at everything, Jay's Wing," Half Moon meowed, answering what exactly what was on his mind. "And even more so now since the prophecy is completed."

Jayfeather opened his mouth to retort against her claim, but no words came out as he knew she was right. He's always been bitter since he was born, being attributed to his blindness and having a short temper, but it has almost seem to be more susceptible now since the battle was finally over.

"And I feel the only way to heal such damage, is for you to find who your heart belongs to," she continued, her eyes boring into his pelt, regret radiating off her.

It suddenly struck him that this was hurting her as much as it was hurting him; she was pushing him away for his happiness, but, as a result, was punishing her own to help the one she loved. "But, Half Moon," Jayfeather mewed, trying one last time to convince her to change her mind, but to little avail.

"No, Jay's Wing," she meowed, closing her eyes to stop anymore tears from coming out, "this is what I want for you," she began to breath quickly, sounding like she could break out into tears any moment now, "It's for your own good."

"But what if I don't want it?"

"Sometimes it isn't what you necessary want, but what your heart wants, what you desire. I mean," she added, a small smile spreading across her face, "look at us, did you ever think you would fall in love with me?"

Now that she said it, it was very true. He never meant to fall in love with this she-cat from the past, he only went back to guide the ancients to the mountains and assign the Stoneteller, never to meet someone and fall in love. _But what would happen if I do find the she-cat that loves me, would I feel the same way as I do for Half Moon?_

"But what if I don't love this cat?" he meowed, putting his thoughts into words.

"Excuse what I'm about to say, Jay's Wing, but that will only happen if you're blind to your feelings, like how you're blind to the world around you. I've seen the ways you two interact anyway, there's no mistaking what is happening between you two and you're just denying it."

He stared once again into his true love's eyes, but they didn't show anything but sadness and love for him, but she wasn't going to budge from her standpoint. She wanted this for him no matter how much it hurt her. She wanted him to be happy at her own cost, and no matter how much he tried to beg, it was futile, she wasn't going to change her mind. Her green eyes lifted away from his blue gaze and fell to the ground of the medicine den; she closed them, trying to stop any tears from falling from them.

"Who?" Jayfeather asked, wanting to relieve some of her pain; it pained him to see her crying at his expense. He had already hurt her once in the past by deciding to name her Stoneteller, so he didn't want to see her in pain again.

"That's for your heart to decide," she replied, not lifting her head to look at him.

_Oh, so she can come here and tell me someone in the clan is in love with me, but she won't reveal it in the end. _

"You should probably fix the issue you started with Briarlight," She meowed, changing the subject, "You hurt her pretty badly."

Before Jayfeather could reply she began to fade away, "Wait!" He yowled too little avail, as she quickly began to fade, blurring what remained of her.

"Remember, Jay's Wing," Jayfeather could hear her faintly, "I'll always love you and I'll wait forever, but you need to find your true love while you're still alive!"

As her voice faded, so did his vision and soon he was again plunged into the familiar darkness. He blinked his eyes and shook his head, getting use to the darkness again. He could still smell the sweet scent of Half Moon exactly where she had been only moments ago. He waited there taking her scent in, savoring his final moments with her, now that it seemed that this could possibly be his last time ever seeing her until he passed on. And finally, when the scent began to fade just like Half Moon, he heeded her final words to patch up his relationship with Briarlight and proceeded out of the den and into the clearing.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

The clearing was surprisingly empty for sunhigh, the most likely cause being the fact that dark, black clouds blanketed the sky, and a scent of impending rain was heavy in the air. Jayfeather could hear by the nursery that the two kits, Lilykit and Seedkit, were playing by the entrance, their mother Sorreltail, watching near-by. He gave a brief nod as her walked by them and into the center of the clearing, intent on finding Briarlight. He lifted his nose into the air and inhaled trying to pinpoint where she had dragged herself off to after their argument. But to his surprise, she wasn't anywhere in the clearing. The only others he could scent was his brother and Cinderheart, sharing some fresh-kill by the pile, and that Brackenfur was guarding the entrance to the camp. Otherwise, the clearing was deserted.

"If you're looking for Briarlight," A tiny voice said. Jayfeather turned his head to the source of the voice, "You won't find her here."

"Why is that, Seedkit?" He inquired, his blind eyes staring at the pale ginger kit, who almost seemed to have read his mind on who he was looking for.

"Because she left with her brother into the forest," The tiny kit quipped happily. Jayfeather pictured a tiny smile spreading across her lips.

_Why is she so happy? Is she hiding something?_

Her sister came forward and cuffed her lightly on the head, "You weren't supposed to tell him!" She meowed angrily, "Briarlight told us not to tell!"

_Oh, so that's how she's going to act, huh. She couldn't possibly be that angry at me. Could she?_

Jayfeather left the two quarreling sisters to fight among themselves and headed towards the camp's entrance, intent on finding out if what Seedkit had said was true. Brackenfur sat close by it, peering blankly out into the forest.

"Hey, Jayfeather," He said, as Jayfeather drew closer. "Going out to gather herbs?" He asked politely.

"No, actually, I was wondering if Briarlight happen to come by here earlier?" Jayfeather inquired, nodding his head towards the sky, "I wouldn't want to be caught in this weather anyway."

Brackenfur nodded his head in agreement, "You got that right," he meowed, "it seems like any moment now the clouds will unload."

"That's why I like to know if Briarlight happen to leave earlier. With her brother perhaps?"

"Actually, she did not too long ago. She left with Bumblestripe, he seemed to be comforting her with something." He meowed staring off into the forest, "I didn't see her face, but it sounded like she had been crying over something. Do you know why?"

"Thank you for the information, Brackenfur," Jayfeather meowed, heading off into the forest.

He could feel Brackenfur's gaze glaring into the back of his head, as he padded away. At least now he knew that Briarlight was, in fact, in the woods with her brother, which calmed him down slightly. But what was this about crying? _Did I really hurt her that bad?_

Jayfeather shook his head, intent on focusing on finding them first. He lifted his nose into the air and sniffed for their combined scent. Finding it, he followed it, making his way around the trees that blocked his way. Even though he was blind, he knew the forest as well as any cat that could see. The scent seemed to be taking him towards the lake, as a faint scent of water mingled in with their scent. They seemed to be heading towards where the lake met with Shadowclan's border. It actually surprised Jayfeather how far she got away from camp. _How long was I talking to Half Moon for?_

Jayfeather entered into the clearing that housed the lake, the big body of water swelled peacefully now, but as soon as the rain kicked up: the water would become wilder. The waves lapped up and down the beach continuously in an endless cycle. He raised his nose and tried to push away the lake's strong watery smell and focusing on Bumblestripe's and Briarlight's scents. Getting a good sense of which way they were heading, he padded along the path he believed they took, along the beach. He could feel the water lap lightly at his paws, but he trudged on regardless.

"Briarlight!" Jayfeather called loudly, "Bumblestripe!"

He didn't hear an answering call, so he walked a little further before trying again, "Briarlight! Bumblestripe! Where are you?"

He began to feel small droplets of rain begin to fall on him. "Oh, great," he muttered. _I better find them before the rain really begins to kick up!_

"Jayfeather? Is that you?" He heard off to the side somewhere.

"Yeah."

Jayfeather heard the familiar sound of Briarlight dragging herself and paw steps that belonged to her brother. He turned to face them; his blind eyes stared deeply into where he felt Briarlight was. He could sense sadness radiating off her pelt and, if Brackenfur was correct, she would have red, puffy eyes from crying. He could also feel confusion on Bumblestripe._ She must have not told him why she was sad._

"What are you doing all the way out here, Jayfeather?" Bumblestripe meowed, bewilderment in his tone.

_Oh, you know, having fun in the rain._ "I came to find you two, is why," Jayfeather answered, "I couldn't find Briarlight in the camp, and Brackenfur told me he saw you two leave earlier, so I decided to come find you before the rain began to pick up." He continued, noticing that the light drizzle was now picking up quickly.

"Why would you care," Briarlight hissed at him, "You only care about yourself!"

"Wait, what?" Bumblestripe meowed, shocked. Jayfeather sensed that Bumblestripe moved his head quickly back and forth between Briarlight and himself. "What is this all about?"

"Nothing," Jayfeather quickly interjected before things could get out of paw. "Look, Briarlight, we can settle this at camp, not right now. I don't want to stay out in this rain must longer."

He could hear her hiss in annoyance, but she didn't say anymore. Jayfeather turned to Bumblestripe, "Let's get back to camp. Okay?"

He nodded his head, but puzzlement still radiated strongly off his fur, but, to Jayfeather's relief, he didn't ask any questions as they made their way back to the stone hollow.

By the time they made it back to the stone hollow, they were drenched from the rain, which had only grown heavier as they hurried their way into the camp. Briarlight meow a good-bye to her brother, who quickly headed towards the warriors den, intent on drying off. Jayfeather waited patiently by the den, his head sticking part way out, waiting for her to finish up and come to the den. _What am I going to say to her? _

She didn't give him much time to think, as she made her way quickly towards the den. Jayfeather moved out of the way, so she could bring herself to her nest to relax. The walk with her brother and the way home had tired her out greatly. She was breathing heavily, but he took that as a sign that she was healing just fine. They were clean, clear breaths, not raspy or choking. _At least that's something to be happy about._

However, the glare she was giving him made his pelt prickle in unease. He could feel a heavy sense of hatred coming off her. It was also heighten by the fact that he could feel her giving him a venomous glare. She was obviously not pleased to be with him right now. _Oh, Starclan, give me strength._

"Briarlight…"

He stopped: he could hear her crying. A small, sobbing sound escaped from her throat, sending ripples of shame through Jayfeather. He couldn't think of anything soothing to say, so he did the only thing he could think of: he sat next to her and wrapped his tail around her shoulders and pressed his body against hers. He licked her head and tried to whisper something soothing into her ear, but, again, he couldn't think of anything to say that sounded right, so meow the only thing he could think of: "I'm sorry," he meowed.

He felt her stare up at him, "Why would you say such hurtful things?" She meowed, still sobbing slightly.

"It was in the spur of the moment, Briarlight," Jayfeather replied, "I was frustrated was all; you know I have a short temper."

"Still," Briarlight replied, "I'm just as disabled as you Jayfeather. Just like you, I can never be a true warrior, defending or feeding my clan because I don't have the use of my back legs. Just like you can't be a warrior because of your blindness, you must know how it feels to not be what you always wanted to be?"

She was making him feel even worse for what he said. He hung his head dejectedly and closed his eyes. _Just like her, I always wanted to be a warrior, but circumstances led me to be where I am now. We're both hurt in our own ways._

"Yes, I know how it feels, Briarlight. And I feel stupid for even saying those things."

She let out an _mrrow of amusement, _"What's so funny?" Jayfeather meowed, confused at her sudden change in temperament.

"The great Jayfeather finally admitting that he did something stupid," She answered, giggling, "That's something I thought I would never live to hear come from your mouth."

Jayfeather smiled at her, happy to finally see her laughing and smiling. It was a sweet sound: her laugh. Something that instantly could wipe off anyone's bad mood or unhappiness, he began to laugh too. He could now feel her smiling at him, a heavy sense of contentment coming off of her. She let out a loud, audible purr and licked his head. He knew he should have pulled away when she did that, but for some reason he didn't; it felt so good that he didn't want to pull away from her. He purred, too, rubbing his head against hers.

"Do you mean it, Jayfeather?" She meowed, which distracted him from his enjoyment of it, "Are you really sorry?"

"Of course, Briarlight," He replied, "I should've never said any of those things, we're both hurt in our own ways… and maybe the same in others." He added, turning his blind gaze onto her eyes.

She purred and rested her head on his chest. He wished that they could just sit like this forever, but a cough from the entrance to the den made Jayfeather instantly withdrew from Briarlight.

"Was I interrupting something?" He recognized His brother's voice, "I can come back later if you want?"

"No, no Lionblaze," Jayfeather quickly said, embarrassed that his brother stumbled in on him and Briarlight close like that, "it's okay, you weren't interrupting in anything."

"Okay…" Lionblaze replied, not quite sure, but Jayfeather heard him move into the den slightly, "I was just checking in on you, you know, because I've been so busy lately that I haven't had the time to see you. So, how are you?"

"Oh, I'm fine" Jayfeather answered, soothing down his fur. "Never been better,"

"That's good," He replied, awkwardly, obviously not sure if he should leave or stay. "And, Briarlight!" He meowed quickly, "how are you?"

"Great," She answered. Jayfeather pictured a smile on her face. "Why do you ask?"

"Oh, I just saw you leaving Jayfeather's den crying, and I thought something was wrong, but…" He meowed, trailing off.

"But what?"

"I see you two are just fine." He answered.

Before Jayfeather could retort, he headed quickly towards the entrance to the den. "I think I'll go now," he meowed quickly, "It was nice catching up with you two." With that, he padded quickly out the den.

"Mouse-brain," Jayfeather grumbled angrily, turning away from the entrance and headed towards the back of the den where the herbs and other necessary things were located. He began to sort through the herbs, intent on finding what he was short on, so that tomorrow he could gather any if necessary. He turned his head a little when he heard Briarlight let out a big yawn.

"I think I'm gonna go to sleep, Jayfeather," She meowed, sluggishly.

"Don't let me stop you," Jayfeather replied, not lifting his head from his work.

"Good-night,"

He meowed the same and continued his sorting without lifting his head. He waited until he could hear her breathing slow and fell into a predictable rhythm: all welcoming signs that she was sleeping. He turned his gray, tabby head towards the spot where Briarlight was resting. He smiled at her, but he quickly caught himself.

_Why am I doing all of this all of a sudden?_ He thought, he had never felt this way before around anyone except… except Half Moon. Suddenly all of her words came back into his mind.

_There is another that loves you. _She had told him, but could Briarlight possibly be that cat she was talking about. He had only viewed her as a friend- a close friend- but a friend in the end. But he couldn't deny what had only happened a short while ago. How she had let her head rest on her chest and how he had allowed it to happen without pulling away. He had even rubbed his head against hers. And he had actually enjoyed doing so, before Lionblaze came barging in. He had accepted it so willingly, without even a sharp retort or unsure comment. He simply accepted what had happen.

It was like he was in a trance when it happened, like he wasn't completely in control of his actions. But could Briarlight possibly be that cat? Possibly be the one Half Moon was talking about? Possibly be the one that could mend his heart from the hole that Half Moon created? And as he made his way to his own nest, he thought that it was quite possible to happen. _But do I want that to happen, to be like my own mother. Break the code that bind the clan together and break my own promise I set all those moons ago. To fall in love?_


	3. Chapter 3

"I'm not a kit anymore, Mom!" Briarlight hissed, rousing Jayfeather from his sleep.

He blinked twice, trying to figure out what was going on; he could scent two other cats were in his den: one being Briarlight and the other was her mother, Millie. He shook his head from the drowsiness. _It's too early for them to be arguing already. _Jayfeather thought angrily.

Rising to his paws, he arched his back high into the air, trying to breathe some life into his limbs. He shook his head again, trying to get rid of the last remnants of sleep out of his head. He moved out of the back of the den in time to hear Millie say: "I only worry for you, Briarlight," she meowed, "I only want the best for you."

"Your 'love' is suffocating me, Mom," Briarlight retorted, "Can't you for one day just leave me alone!"

"But you can't do anything," Millie replied. "I only do these things to provide for you."

_She's saying all the wrong things!" _Jayfeather thought sharply in his head. _You're only making things worse, you mouse-brain!_

"Get out of my den!" Jayfeather hissed, surprising himself with his own ferocity. Thrusting himself between the two she-cats, he locked eyes with Millie. "Get out!"

"But she's my daughter!"

"I don't care!" He growled, "You're only making her feel worse! You think your constant pampering of her is helping, but let me tell you, it's not! Okay? Now get out!"

He could picture raising her face in indignation and her fur on end, but he didn't care right now about her feelings. He was more worried on Briarlight, who was hanging her head low and he could feel her holding back tears. "Get out!" He growled, one last time through clenched teeth.

She let out a snarl, but didn't say anything more. Instead he could hear her backing out of the den and into the clearing, waves of anger beaming off of her.

Jayfeather sighed; shaking his head he turned to Briarlight. He could still sense sadness radiating off her body, which distressed him greatly. "Briarlight…"

"Why does she do this to me?" She cried, burrowing her head onto his shoulder. "She always has to make me feel useless."

"You're not useless," Jayfeather replied, licking the top of her head in comfort.

"But I am, aren't I?"

"No, you are not!" He snapped at her, "You're perfect the way you are!"

He felt her pull away from him and could feel her eyes staring into his own blind eyes. A soft, gentle gaze into his own; it made him feel like he was with Half Moon again. _Maybe Half Moon's right; maybe I could live like this?_

_ No! I can't! It goes against the warrior's code. But how can it feel so right if it's forbidden?_

"Do you really mean it, Jayfeather?" She meowed, tearing him away from the tormenting thoughts.

Jayfeather nodded his head without hesitation, "To me Briarlight, it doesn't matter how you look because I can't see, "he meowed, comfortingly. "To me your one imperfection on the outside doesn't matter; it's what on the inside that matters to me."

"Really? Because I think you're perfect the way you are, too." She replied, some new emotion beaming off of her in waves. _Affection? _"I mean you have a short temper, but I always felt like you were just hiding yourself from others. That you think that if you show others even an inkling of kindness, that they will think you weak; that they will pity you even more." She meowed, dragging herself closer to him until he could feel her breath on his face. "But you don't have to act that way around me, Jayfeather. You can tell me how you actually feel, I'll understand."

:Jayfeather!" His brother's voice called loudly from outside the den.

Jayfeather could hear Brairlight dragging herself away from him and towards the back of the den. "You should go see who that is," She meowed, frustration in her tone, "I'll just be back here, sorting out the herbs."

"You should also do your exercises soon," Jayfeather meowed, heading towards the entrance. Stopping at the front of the crevice, he turned around and meowed: "I'll be back soon. Okay?

Pushing himself through the crevice, he entered into the drenched clearing. The rain had carried on deep into the night, and the clearing was still wet. _At least the herbs will be growing with the help of the rain. _He thought.

"Jayfeather!" Lionblaze called again.

Pinpointing him lying near the nursery with his mate, Cinderheart; both of Sorreltail's kits were playing around them. Jayfeather rolled his eyes and padded quickly towards them. _Of course he's lying with Cinderheart: he rarely leaves her side now. I wouldn't be surprised if it was her who put him up to talking with me._

"How are you doing, Jayfeather?" She meowed, as he stopped in front of them.

"Fine," was his simple respond, "how do you feel with your kits and all?"

"I feel good; I haven't felt anything unusual that would make me feel worried."

"That's good," He replied, nodding, "and how are you, Lionblaze?"

"I'm great," he answered, happily, "especially since I'm with Cinderheart." He purred, rubbing his head against her head.

Jayfeather rolled his eyes, _if they're going to start doing this; I think I'm going to at least fetch something to eat. _He thought, hearing the rumble of his stomach. _Maybe I'll share with Briarlight?_

Leaving them where they are, Jayfeather made his way across the clearing, towards the fresh-kill pile. He could scent Squirrelflight and Leafpool grooming each other by the warriors's den. They stopped and he could feel them staring at him. _What could they possibly want?_

He didn't want anything to do with his surrogate mother or real mother. _Liars_, he simply thought as he walked past them and stuck his head into the fresh-kill pile. _Now what can I get that both Briarlight and I can share?_

Deciding on a vole, he hurried back to the medicine den, wanting to get out of the sight of Squirrelflight and Leafpool, who were still staring at him. His fur began to prickle in discomfort as he made his way into the den. He turned his head to the entrance, half expecting them to come in after him to continue their unending staring.

"Is something wrong, Jayfeather," Briarlight meowed, worried.

Pulling his head away from the entrance, he turned to Briarlight, "No," he meowed quickly; "here I brought some fresh-kill to share." He added, changing the subject.

Dropping the vole on the ground, "Oh, you didn't have to," Briarlight meowed, dragging herself towards him.

"I know I didn't have to," Jayfeather replied, a smile on his face, "I wanted to. Now are you going to eat this with me, or do I have the pleasure of eating it all?"

She didn't need a second bidding. Positioning herself right next to him, she leaned her head down and took a bite of the vole. He could just feel her pelt lightly touching his, but, again, he didn't pull away from her, instead, he pulled himself slightly closer to her. He could hear her purr, but he couldn't be sure from what: the fresh-kill or him being so close to her.

Soon the vole was demolished completely and after burying the leftovers, Jayfeather got up and stretched his legs out. "Briarlight," he began, turning his blind gaze onto her, "have you done your exercises let?"

"No," she replied, "I was about to when you brought in the vole."

"Do them."

"Okay," she groaned, not entirely intent on doing her exercises. Suddenly he could feel her brighten up, "can I have the kits help me? You know: play moss ball and all that?"

"Why not," He answered, shrugging his shoulders, "Don't strain yourself," he added, before she dragged herself entirely out of the den.

_Solitude, _he thought, turning his head towards the back of the den and making his way towards the herb storage, _exactly what I'm used to. Guess I better check the herbs again, I forgot what I was short on. That's unusual: I never forget what I need or what I have. _He shrugged it off. _Well, there's a first time for everything I guess._

He sorted through the herbs quickly, setting the ones he was short on off to another pile in the corner. Finally finding that he was short on watermint, yarrow and burdock, he headed towards the entrance to tell Briarlight he was leaving and then to go and collect the herbs. He was stopped by a small shuffling of paws he heard by the entrance. He raised his nose to the air to pick up the cat's scent. _Sandstorm!_

"Come in," he called loudly, inviting the ginger she-cat in.

Even though he had welcomed her in, he could still hear her walking in reluctantly. He was struck by a wave of depression when she finally stood in front of him. He pictured her head held low and sadness blanketing her eyes. And it wasn't a mystery to him why she was like this. Her mate, the previous leader, Firestar, was killed in the battle with the Dark Forest. He was killed by Tigerstar, a big, muscular dark brown tabby tom, and father of Thunderclan's current leader, Bramblestar. However, he was still able to kill Tigerstar as well.

His death left the whole clan in a state of depression, but, like any other death, they had to move on and keep him in their thoughts. But Sandstorm hasn't seemed to come to that point yet. Instead she usually trudged her way through day, not entirely focused on any task she was doing. Be it hunting or patrolling, it didn't seem like her heart was into clan life anymore. It also seemed that her depression carried on into her sleep, which she wasn't getting enough of, and when she did lie down to sleep, it didn't last long until a nightmare woke her up.

Jayfeather had, for a short period of time, given her poppy seeds to allow her to peacefully sleep, but he eventually cut her off. He told her that he couldn't keep wasting poppy seeds on her; he would need them for patients that were hurt badly. And it seemed for a short while that she was okay with it, but eventually she started to pester him about giving her more. She even got Graystripe to try and convince him to give her some, but he turned him down and snapped at him to actually be a friend to her and try to help her through the pain: he didn't come back for that type of thing again.

And it wasn't hard for Jayfeather to determine that was exactly the reason she was here for. "You know what I'm here for?" She meowed, her green gaze staring into Jayfeather's blind eyes. He nodded his head without replying, "Please, Jayfeather," she begged, "I need them! I can't sleep!"

It made Jayfeather sick to his stomach to see the once strong she-cat reduce to begging for poppy seed of all things. "I'm sorry, Sandstorm," He replied, trying to be soothing as possible, "but I simply can't allow you to have anymore. You need to heal on your own without the help of medicine."

"I don't care," she hissed, "I haven't slept in sunrises!"

"Maybe if you could move on from his death, maybe you could!" He snapped angrily at her. "You haven't been the same cat since his death! It barely seems like you can make it through a sunrise without appearing to be dead!"

"Maybe if I slept I would be happier!"

"That isn't the problem! Even if you sleep, you'll be the same as you are now. A bitter, depress she-cat, who, despite everything, is the she-cat that everyone in this clan loves. It kills us to see you like this, we all know you're better than this – so show us!"

He started to hear her begin to hyperventilate and could sense that she was on the verge of tears. _Oh, for Starclan's sake!_

He hurried out of the den and into the clearing, lifting his nose in the air to locate the two she-cats he didn't want to see right now. He located Squirrelflight and Leafpool at the same spot he had scented them earlier at, near the warrior's den. He quickly ran up to them, and ignoring the shock that radiated off their pelts at his approach, he meowed: "Your mother needs you right now, she's in my den!"

Without waiting for a reply, he hurried back towards his den. He didn't like leaving Sandstorm alone in his den, not sure if she might actually try to take some poppy seeds while he was gone. But, to his relief, she hadn't seemed to move and when he checked to make sure she hadn't eaten any of the seeds: they hadn't been disturbed a bit. Sandstorm, on the other paw, was still breathing quickly and he could picture her crying, small, watery tears escaping her eyes and striking the floor of the den.

"Mom!" He heard Squirrelflight's and Learpool's voice call in unison and hearing them push themselves swiftly into the den. They stopped in front of Sandstorm.

"Mother," Squirrelflight meowed, pushing her body close to her mother's, "What's wrong?

"What do you think is wrong, mouse-brain?" Sandstorm hissed, but Jayfeather could still sense sadness radiating strongly off her body.

Squirrelflight didn't even flinch at her mother's harsh tone, "It's okay," she cooed, soothingly to her, "I miss him too, we all miss him." She put her tail lightly onto Sandstorm's shoulders. Leading her to the entrance, "come on, he'll always be with you. He's probably up in Starclan watching right now." Her voice petered off as she moved further away from the den, until couldn't be heard no more.

She had left, but for some reason Leafpool didn't, instead she remained idle by the entrance. He could feel her eyes on him, a repeat of earlier when she stared at him while he fetched some fresh-kill. _What does she want?_

"It's gonna take some time for her to heal," she finally meowed.

"She's had a couple moons now to heal," he replied, "she can't continue like this forever. She's going to have to let go of him."

"That's easier said than done," she meowed, a tint of sadness in her voice.

_She's thinking of Crowfeather. _He thought, rolling his eyes at the thought of his father that lived in Windclan.

"Yeah, well, she's going to have to let go of him. He's dead and in Starclan as we speak."

"How would you know?" She snapped, "You've never lost a mate before!"

He narrowed his eyes at her,_ If only you knew._ "I have to collect some herbs," he meowed, making his way towards the entrance, "maybe you should go check on your mother with Squirrelflight."

He pushed himself past her and into the clearing. He heard Cherrypaw and Molepaw by the apprentice den, simply relaxing in the sunhigh sunlight. Cinderheart must've moved back into the nursery because he couldn't smell her where he had her with Lionblaze, and it seemed Lionblaze must've gone on a patrol because he couldn't scent him anywhere around camp. He picked up Briarlight's scent by the Nursery, however, playing with the kits. He stared at her for a while, wishing he could see her just this once- but he quickly shook his head. _I can't be having those thoughts, no matter how much I wish to be with her, it can't happen. I won't be like my mother!_

But as he nodded at Dustpelt, who was on guard duty, he couldn't help but feel like he was lying to himself. _Maybe I'm acting like my mother more than I believe, maybe I want to have a mate more than I ever thought possible. Half Moon taught me that, that I wanted a mate, but could she possibly be the one. She surely seemed interested in me, and much as I would like to disagree, I can't help but be slightly interested in her as well. _

But the one thought kept striking him, as he made his way through the forest, _It's forbidden. It's forbidden._

* * *

Jayfeather could feel the sun was started to set as he made his way back in camp, his mouth filled with the herbs he needed. He nose was clogged with the combined scents of the watermint, yarrow and burdocks, but he could still hear perfectly fine and he could hear the familiar voice of his brother and mate discussing something by the fresh-kill, but he didn't pay any attention to what they were saying. Instead, he piled himself into the medicine den, wanting to drop and sort the herbs into their predetermined piles.

"Hey, Jayfeather," He heard Briarlight's cheerful meowed, as he walked past her.

He simply nodded his head at her; his mouth filled with the herbs disabled him from replying. He dropped the herbs into a pile and told Briarlight to sort them into the correct pile.

"Why? Where are you going?"

"I'm going to check on someone very fast," Jayfeather answered, heading towards the exit. "It'll only take a moment."

He didn't wait for a reply, pushing himself through the exit; he felt the ferns pressing lightly against his body. He scented Squirrelflight resting near the warriors den and he made his way quickly towards her. He wanted to ask about Sandstorm. Despite his apparent indifference to Sandstorm's earlier plight, he was, in fact, greatly worried about her well-being. She was, after all, kin.

"How's Sandstorm?" Jayfeather asked, stopping in front of Squirrelflight.

"Bad," She replied sadly. He could picture her shaking her head, "she won't eat anything no matter how much I coax her to. Leafpool tried as well, so did Graystripe, but she won't listen to any of us."

"Is she in there," He meowed, pointing his tail towards the den.

"Yeah, but she won't talk to anyone. Not even to her own daughters. Oh, Jayfeather," She meowed, sounding like she was about to cry, "I'm worried about her, she hasn't been the same since dad died."

"I know," he simply replied, "let me try to talk to her."

She sighed, but didn't object. She moved out of the way: "Please be easy on her." She meowed, before he had entered.

He nodded and then pushed his way into the warriors den. The nettle patch scraped lightly against his head as he entered. He picked up Sandstorm's scent close to the center of the den, but otherwise it was empty. The only other cat in the den was Brackenfur, who was dozing off towards the other side of the den.

He approached Sandstorm: "How are you doing?" He meowed, sitting down in front of her, his tail wrapped around front paws.

She didn't answer, but he could feel her staring blankly at him. He couldn't sense anything she was feeling, almost like she completely shut down, like she was dead to the world. He tried to read her mind- but, oddly, it was as blank as her stare. He was beginning to feel slightly frightful at her condition. _It's a lot worse than I thought._

"Sandstorm," he tried one more time, "Can you hear me?"

"Firestar," she mumbled quietly.

"He's not here," he answered, "he's in Starclan where he belongs."

"He didn't deserve to die."

"He died defending the clan."

"Does that change anything?" She whispered, "Does that change the fact that he is dead?"

"He died a hero."

"Don't get me started on heroes," she snorted. "Everyone who fought in the battle is a hero, not just the ones who lost their lives. It doesn't matter rather you live or die in battle."

"He didn't die for nothing."

"I know that. He died killing the one he hated. Selfish."

"He didn't kill him because he hated him," Jayfeather replied, "he died defending those he loves. Me, you, Squirrelflight, the clan, he died defending those he loves. True warriors don't defend their clan because they hate the enemy, but die defending the things they love behind them. Die defending the queens, die defending the kits, defending the ones they care about the most: kin. He wasn't selfish, Sandstorm, he loved the clan too much to see it be destroyed by Tigerstar and his endless ambition."

She didn't answer him for a long time, instead she seemed to occupy herself with staring at the ground, but at least he was finally able to get some emotion off of her. It seemed like she was feeling conflicted on what he had just told her, like two different spirits were inside her trying to gain control over the other. One of depression and sadness, the other of acceptance and happiness: he urged the latter on.

"You're wise, Jayfeather," she finally answered, after an extremely lengthy pause.

"Well, I better be, I am medicine cat after all."

"Do you really think that was what he was doing?" She meowed, staring intently up at him.

"I wouldn't have said it, if I didn't think it was true."

"Thank you, Jayfeather," she replied graciously, rising to her paws. "I think I'm going to go fetch something to eat."

He nodded his head, "That would be wise."

She licked him on the head quickly before departing thought the exit. The only sound now was the snoring of Brackenfur in the corner. He suddenly felt another presence by him; he turned his head and instantly knew the scent. His surrogate mother, Squirrelflight sat down next to him.

"What did you tell her?" She inquired, obviously startled at her mother's sudden change in temperament.

"Just what she needed to hear," he answered, padding towards the exit. "Make sure she eats." He called over his shoulder.

As soon as he exited the warriors den, he made his way quickly through the clearing to his own den. He could scent that Sandstorm had kept through on her intent to eat, as he could scent her by the fresh-kill pile. He entered the den with a smile on his face, a rarity.

"I sorted the herbs already," he heard Briarlight meow, as soon stuck his head into the den. He nodded his head in reply. "So, who did you help?" Was that jealously in her voice?

_Did she think I really snuck out behind her back to see another she-cat? She couldn't possibly think that._

"Sandstorm."

"Oh."

Was that relief in her tone?

"What was wrong?" She inquired.

"She was still suffering from Firestar's death." He answered truthfully, "I sorted it out though."

"I didn't have any doubts that you would," She replied, flatteringly. "You do have an extremely considerate heart, enough to understand everyone problems. You just don't show it all the time."

Jayfeather shrugged his shoulders indifferently, though the compliments were making him feel slightly embarrassed. "So, how was your time spent with the kits?" He meowed, trying to change the subject.

"Oh, it was great!" She beamed happily, "they're so energetic and kind. They'll make great apprentices when their time comes." She sighed sadly suddenly, "I wish I be mentor to one of them, but this stupid," she growled, turning her head as far backwards as she could, "injury won't allow me to."

"Do you ever regret what happened," Jayfeather asked. As soon as the words left his mouth, he knew it was a stupid question.

But Briarlight took it in stride. "Every day I regret what happened, but… but sometimes I don't feel any regrets whatsoever." Jayfeather could feel her eyes gazing at him, but she quickly lowered them, embarrassment blazing off of her.

She didn't speak for what seemed like a moon, "Jayfeather, what do you think of me?" She asked, catching him totally by surprise.

"Well, I… uh…" he stammered, "I think you're a great cat and that you're extremely strong for fighting through this injury." He looked up, making eye contact with her, "And I think you're a really good friend." _And maybe even something more, _he thought quietly to himself.

"Am I a burden?"

"No," he answered, surprised she would even say such a thing. "You're a great help around the den and a fantastic companion."

'Do you…li… never mind." She meowed, he could hear move over to where her nest was, "I think I'm going to go to sleep."

"Good idea," Jayfeather replied, suddenly realizing how drowsy he was. Heading towards his nest and lying down. "Good night, Briarlight."

"You too," she replied.

It didn't take long for her to fall into a peacefully sleep. Her breathing sounding clear and clean. It seemed like the infection that he had feared greatly, was slowly dying down. But that wasn't what he wanted to focus on right now. He was a lot more interested in what Briarlight was going to say before she stopped herself.

_It sounded like she was going to say rather or not I liked her, and I don't think she meant in a friend sort of way. _Jayfeather thought, feeling the peaceful embrace of sleep coming ever so closer. _And I'm surprised that I'm not even shocked that she would even mention such a thing. What happens when she finally worked up the nerve to say it to my face? Will I say yes or no?_

He couldn't think any further as the calm embrace finally smothered him completely, and he was sleeping peacefully.


	4. Chapter 4

"Watch it!" Jayfeather snarled at Foxleap, who has just bumped into him.

"Sorry," Foxleap muttered, backing up to give him some more room.

He heard Foxleap scrap his claws up against the log and pulled himself up onto it. Jayfeather began to feel his scent weaken as he moved along the log to the otherside of the lake, where the island resided. It was his turn as he approached the log, his brother tailing behind him to help just in case he fell. He pulled himself up without a problem, and continued along the log with ease, being used to it because of the countless gatherings he has already attended. In a matter of moments, he was on the other side of the log waiting for the rest of his clan to come across.

Bramblestar was the last one to cross, and as soon as he sure everyone was already across; he moved to the front of the group and took the lead. Leading them into the lush forest, he stopped just short of the gathering spot: a clearing with a giant oak tree, whose lower branches were where the four leaders sat and spoke to the assembled clans. Jayfeather could already scent the other three clans were in there, waiting for his clan to join. He could feel the impatience beaming off of their pelts.

"Go," Bramblestar simply meowed, inviting the ones gathered behind him to proceed forwards.

Jayfeather heard a thundering of paws as they all quickly ran forwards. Dividing himself away from the rest of the gathered cats, who all broke off to talk to old friends in other clans; he went directly towards the other medicine cats.

"Hey Jayfeather," He heard Willowshine meow as he approached.

Slowing his pace until he stood among the huddled group of medicine cats, he nodded at Willowshine, who sat off directly to his left.

"How's everything in your clan?" She meowed, trying to keep a conversation with him going, "I hope everything's alright."

"Everything's fine," Jayfeather replied, "No greencough, no injuries," Shaking his head. "Nothing."

"That's good," she replied cheerily, "The same with my clan. No one's hurt or sick, thank Starclan." He pictured a smile spread across her face. "The same with every other clan practically," she continued.

"Yeah," Littlecloud interjected, "except for Tigerheart dislocating his shoulder from a hunting accident. However, that's the only injury that has occurred in a while." Turning to Kestrelflight, "How's everything in you clan going?" He asked.

Jayfeather could suddenly sense him tense up, "Everything's fine," he quickly answered.

Littlecloud and Willowshine kept conversing to each other, but Jayfeather noticed that Kestrelflight seemed to have withdrawn to himself. He could sense that he seemed to be exhausted, like he's been working all night. And the fact that he tensed up when asked how things in Windclan were going. Coupled this with his apparent state of exhaustion and him not being in the mood to elaborate on his clan, there was obviously something going on in Windclan.

But before Jayfeather could ponder any further on the subject, he heard Bramblestar call: "This gathering will now commence." Immediately the entire clearing grew silent, all their eyes staring up intently at the four leaders. "I'll start the proceedings," he continued. Quickly delving into it, "Thunderclan is doing well, the prey is running well and we have strong, healthy kits."

He must've finished there, because Jayfeather could hear Shadowclan's leader, Blackstar, speaking: "The same goes for Shadowclan. No diseases to report, however, one of my warriors suffered from a small injury- but he's healing just fine." He added sharply, "The kits are strong as well."

"Riverclan is fine as well," Mistystar meowed, raising her voice, "the fish in the river has never been as plentiful as they are now. Every cat is well fed and we have surplus of fresh-kill to go along with it."

Last was Windclan's leader, Onestar, who, like Kestrelflight, Jayfeather could sense that he seemed exhausted from something. _What could be going on in Windclan that has both the leader and Medicine cat losing sleep and energy over it?_

He didn't get the answered from Onestar though; instead Onestar basically repeated what the other three leaders said. And with that, the gathering was annulled. Jayfeather could hear Windclan make a hasty retreat into the surrounding forest, their paw-steps fading quickly.

_Something's wrong, there's something going on in Windclan, that much is clear, but what? They're too proud to admit what's bothering them. Mousebrains. _Jayfeather thought, shaking his head.

"Jayfeather," he heard his brother call, "are you trying to get yourself left behind?"

"Coming," he replied, shaking his head to clear his thoughts. _I shouldn't have to worry about Windclan anyway, as long as they keep their problems to themselves._

With that last thought, he followed Lionblaze out of the clearing and back home, back to the camp. _Back to Briarlight._

* * *

"What are Windclan cats doing here?" A loud growl erupted from outside the den, waking Jayfeather.

He blinked his eyes open, and shook his head quickly. Turning his head towards the entrance, he could hear more shuffling as the other clan members woke up from the morning sentry's growl. He could hear multiple shouts of protest and insults being hurled at the Windclan cats. The loudest of who was Cloudtail, who was calling them rabbit-chasers and other rather colorful names, the Windclan cat growled at him, but didn't sound like he did anything.

"What's going on?" He heard Briarlight meow, dragging herself until she stood shoulder to shoulder with him.

That was a good question, why exactly was Windclan visiting the camp. If they wanted to say something, they could've said it at the gathering. So, in the end, Jayfeather said the obvious fact: "It seems like Windclan's paying us a visit." He meowed.

"Do you think they have some sort of quarrel with us?" She replied, sounding slightly frighten at the possibility of a battle with Windclan.

"I don't think so," he meowed, trying to assuage her fears. "If they wanted to start a quarrel, they would've said something at the gathering, not have two cats show up to confront an entire clan."

"Then why are they here?"

Jayfeather shook his head, "I don't know," he meowed. He began to get up and head towards the exit, intent on finding out what exactly was going on outside.

"Where are you going, Jayfeather?" He head Briarlight meow, alarmed that he was leaving her alone in the den.

_She sounds like I'm going out there to take on a hoard of badgers. Does she really think that Windclan came here for war?_

"I'm just going to check what's going on," he answered, "I won't take long."

Without waiting for any further questions, Jayfeather pushed himself out of the den and into the clearing. He felt the warm sunlight blanket her fur, warming his body. And as he walked towards the middle where all the commotion is, he felt a cool gentle breeze brush lightly against him. But unlike the breeze, which was calm and gentle, the cats that gathered around the Windclan cats were anything less than peaceful. Many of them were growling, hissing and spitting at the Windclan cats. And Jayfeather could only imagine that some cats might actually be swiping at them.

_Where's Bramblestar. _Jayfeather thought, realizing that he couldn't scent Bramblestar anywhere near or around the mob of angry cats. He wasn't even in the clearing; instead Jayfeather could scent him near or in his den. _What is he doing?_

Finally he scented him walking out of his den; albeit quite slow, like he didn't have anything to worry about. He approached the mob, which allowed a small opening, so that he could get near the Windclan cats, which Jayfeather could sense were agitated from the constant harassment.

"What is Windclan doing in here?" He meowed, but it wasn't to the two Windclan cat, but to Cloudtail.

"I don't know?" He answered, "They never said anything about it."

"That's because you didn't give up any time to explain!" The Windclan cat hissed.

"Then why are you here?" Bramblestar asked, this time directing it towards the two cats.

"Because there's trouble in Windclan," the other cat answered, having an unmistakable she-cat's voice. "Onestar wanted us to come see if your clan would help?"

"Why didn't you bring it up at the gathering?"

"We didn't want to seem weak in front of the other clans," the other cat answered."

"So why come to us?" Cloudtail meowed, confusion radiating off his pelt.

"Because Onestar hopes that we can still work together to get rid of this one problem, like he said that Thunderclan and Windclan used to do in the past."

"That was then, this i-…" Bramblestar glared at Cloudtail, sending him into silence.

"What's the problem?" He inquired curiosity in his tone.

"The twolegs by the horseplace," the she-cat began, relief in her voice, "got a new dog, and this thing is unbelievably huge! They let this thing roam around all sunrise and, thank Starclan, it hasn't found our camp yet- but it's already mauled Weaselfur and nearly attacked Crowfeather!"

Jayfeather's ears perked up at the mention of his father in Windclan. True, Jayfeather didn't care much for him, but he still saved Lionblaze from being attacked by Breezepelt in the great battle. And for that, he was grateful to his father for saving him. Though, he wonders what happen to Breezepelt after the battle.

"This dog is drawing closer and closer to the camp," The male cat continued, "we've tried to lead it off the trail, but it's becoming too risky to continually send out warriors to distract this dog. He picks the trail back up the next sunrise anyway."

"So you want us to help you drive this dog off?" Bramblestar meowed, after a brief moment of consideration.

"Yes," meow the she-cat, "we need Thunderclan's help to get rid of this mutt."

Bramblestar sat down and stared at the two Windclan cats, taking their plight in. His eyes seem to fill with uncertainty. He was not sure if he should help Windclan or just leave them to struggle through their own problems. _Honestly, I think he should let them fight their own battles. Why do they need our help? We can't simply help a rival clan, because they're having some issues. There are borders for a reason._

"No," he finally meowed after a brief moment of consideration.

"Wh-what," the she-cat meowed, "bu-but you can't, we need your help."

"Sorry, but we can't simply waste our own clan members to help Windclan fight off a dog," he replied, indifferent to her pleading.

"But what happens if the dog finds our camp?" The tom meowed.

"Well," Bramblestar replied, "take the fight to the dog; fight it off before it finds the camp."

"We've already tried that!" The she-cat growled, "That's how Weaselfur was mauled, and Crowfeather was nearly attacked too. This thing is too strong to be stopped by our clan solely."

"Dogs are stupid creatures, so why don't you try to trick it with something?" Cloudtail interjected.

"Like how? Lead it off a cliff?" She snorted, "If you haven't noticed we don't have many cliffs in our territory."

"Why don't you use deathberries," Jayfeather meowed, stepping up to the front of the mob, "place it on some fresh-kill or something and leave it out in the open, and when the dog comes, he'll see it and eat it."

"But we don't keep those berries in our camp," the tom replied, "we don't want any kits breaking into the medicine den and accidently eating them."

"That isn't a problem," Jayfeather meowed, motioning his tail towards his den," I keep some in my den just in case they're needed. And with Bramblestar's permission I could give you some." He turned his head towards Bramblestar, "If that's okay?"

"I don't see why not," Bramblestar answered, shrugging his powerful shoulders, "it's at least something to help with their problems without wasting our own warriors."

Nodding his head, Jayfeather sprinted towards his den. Pushing his way in and past Briarlight's inquiring gaze. He picked up the small, red berries into his mouth, being careful to not put too much force on it. He padded his way slowly out of the den and back to the assembled cats.

"Here," he meowed, dropping the berries in front of the Windclan cats, "take these, but make sure to not crush any of the berries in your mouth."

"Thank you," the tom said, gently grabbing the berries into his mouth. "This won't be forgotten in my clan."

"I will need some of my warriors to escort you out of our territory," Bramblestar meowed, "It's just a precaution. Squirrelflight and Sandstorm," he continued, singling the two she-cats out, "please lead these two back to their own territory."

They complied readily, and soon the four cats were out of the clearing. The excitement around the camp also dispersed when they left, the warriors walked off to Bramblestar, waiting for their partrol assignments, or those that have apprentices, took them out to train. The queens, who had remained in the nursery the whole time only leaving their heads out to watch the commotion, stuck their heads back into the den.

Shrugging, Jayfeather headed back towards his den, stopping only to say hello to his brother who had happened to pass by before plunging his way into his den.

"What did they want?" Briarlight meowed, immediately bombarding him with her question, "I saw you take those deathberries, but what for?"

"Windclan's having trouble with a new dog in their territory," he replied, taking a small drink from the pool located off to the side of the den. "It had already attacked Weaselfur and nearly mauled Crowfeather."

"Great Starclan!" She exclaimed, "That's horrible!"

_That's an understatement,_ he thought, rolling his eyes.

"Why did they come here than?"

"They wanted to see if we would help them drive it off." He replied, "However, Bramblestar said no, but I offered a suggestion on the deathberries. They're going to hide it in a rabbit and leave it out so that the dog will eat it."

"Hopefully that gets rid of the problem."

Jayfeather padded over to the herb storage and began to sort through them. "Hopefully it does," He agreed.

"Do you need any help with the herbs?"

"No, I got everything under control here," he answered, separating the misplaced burdock from the watermint. _How did I let that happen?_

He heard Briarlight's belly begin to growl, "Briarlight, if you're hungry you can get some fresh-kill to eat, you don't have to stand there and watch me shuffle through the herbs." He meowed, also noticing her glaring at him for an uncomfortable amount of time.

"Oh, sorry," She meowed, turning her face down towards the ground, embarrassment radiating off her fur. "I'll go get something for us to share."

Before Jayfeather could protest that he wasn't hungry, she was already out of the den and he could hear her dragging herself through the clearing. He sighed; at least this would give him some time to contemplate about these awkward feelings about Briarlight, which had only seem to kick up after Half Moon's visit to him only about a couple sunrises ago.

_Had I always had these feelings for her buried deep inside me?_ He thought: _Had Half Moon's awaken these feelings. And why is Briarlight showing him these signs of affection now? Or had she always shown him these signs and he just ignored them? _

It seemed likely; counting all the moments she had gone out of her way to help him. Such as the time he came home from the checking out the tunnels where he had thought Hollyleaf was crushed out stones and dirt, but came home without a body and covered in dirt and mud. She had insisted on cleaning him off, which he allowed, already feeling sleepy from the tunnel exploration. Then, after the gathering where Dawnpelt directly accused him of allowing Flamepelt to die, she had taken care of him. She had dried off his fur; brought him a mouse when he awoke, and even defended him when he had replied sarcastically to her question. But she had defended him, he had chalked it up just her loyalty to him, but had it really been something else? Had she him her affection earlier and he had just never noticed? Did he also have feelings for her that he hid from her and even himself that were now bubbling over because of Half Moon?

"Hey Jayfeather," He heard Briarlight's happy mew as she dragged herself into the den, "I brought a mouse for us to share."

"Actually I'm not that hungry," He replied, snapping his head to her.

He could sense disapproval in her gaze, "Jayfeather," she began, "You can't over work yourself and become weak from hunger. So come here and share this mouse with me!" She meowed command fully, but hid a small sense of playfulness in her tone.

He rolled his eyes, but didn't argue with her. He padded over to where she laid, already taking a small bite of the mouse, whose scent overwhelmed Jayfeather's nose and he suddenly realized how, in fact, hungry he was. He laid down fight next to Briarlight and took a small, tentative bite of it.

"There you go," Briarlight mewoed happily, talking like she was cooing to a kit who refused to eat. "It wasn't that bad. Was it?"

"Terrible," Jayfeather replied, sarcastically. "It tastes like wood." He continued, smiling.

"Fine, but I'm not grabbing a new one." She said, faking being indignant.

Suddenly they could hear a small commotion outside again. It sounded like a bunch of cats yowling at the entrance.

"Oh, what is it this time?" Jayfeather grumbled, turning his blind gaze towards the entrance, "A twoleg barreling into the camp?"

But the reality of things soon stuck them, and sent an enormous sense of fear stinging down their spines, "Windclan's attacking!"


	5. Chapter 5

Jayfeather could hear the clearing outside descend into chaos as Windclan broke through the bramble entrance and met the ranks of surprised Thunderclan warriors; they growled and snarled as they met. Soon Jayfeather could scent the sick scent of blood in the clearing as he heard the cats fighting one another.

"Hold, Thunderclan," He heard Bramblestar loud call, "we can't allow them to win the battle!"

Jayfeather moved quickly to the back of the den, he had to be prepared for the wounded after the battle.

"Why are they attacking us?" He could hear Briarlight meow fearfully, "I thought they had the problem with the dog?"

"They must've lied to get us off our guard," He replied. "They've been planning this for a while."

"But what would provoke them to attack us in the first place? We haven't done anything to provoke any such respond."

_That's a fair question. Why are they attacking us? Gain more territory, show off the strength of their clan, or gain more hunting grounds. Of course that leaves the question of how they would adapt to hunting in a forest. _

"Jayfeather!" Briarlight meowed fearfully, sinking low to the ground.

"What?" He snapped, "Don't you see I'm busy preparing for the wounded?"

"You won't be for long," He heard snickering from the entrance to the den.

Turning his blind gaze towards the entrance, he could scent the moorland smell of a Windclan cat in his den walking slowly towards them.

It was still snickering to himself as he approached, "Remember me?" He asked

"You're the one I gave the deathberries to," Jayfeather answered, remembering the young tom's familiar tone.

"Not too bad for a blind medicine cat," He meowed, suddenly his laughing growing louder, "and who is this? Your apprentice? Ha, is this what Thunderclan relies on to keep their clan healthy? A blind cat and his crippled assistant, what has Thunderclan come to?"

"Why are you here?" Jayfeather meowed, trying his best to keep his temper down. Though, he could also feel Briarlight's fur bristle in anger. However, he couldn't let their anger get the best of them.

"Well isn't obvious?" He laughed, "To take you out."

"You can't kill a medicine cat," Briarlight meowed, rising to her forepaws, "Starclan won't allow such a thing to happen."

"It was willed by my leader to do so," he replied, "and I think it's better to obey my living leader than listen to a bunch of dead cats. However, I shouldn't leave a witness, so I think I'll take care of you as well."

"No!" Jayfeather growled, putting himself between the warrior and Briarlight, "I won't let you hurt her!"

The warrior seemed slightly taken aback at the ferocity in Jayfeather's voice, but his bewilderment didn't last long as he began his slow, steady approach again, slowly pressing them up against the back of the den.

Jayfeather gritted his teeth and sunk low to the ground, trying his best to remember what little battle training he learned from Leafpool all those moons ago. But what could he do to a full fledge warrior of Windclan? He was after all blind, which left him at a major disadvantage against him. But he had Briarlight to defend, he had to win. He couldn't allow this pathetic, cowardly warrior harm her.

He lunged forward, but was quickly struck down and pinned easily. He kicked at the warrior's belly, which only slightly staggered him, but left enough of an opening to get himself removed from his grasp. Pushing himself away from the cat and slowly raising to his paws, he realized that rising slowly was a mistake, as the warrior quickly recovered and slammed into him, stunning him and making his collapse into one of the suddenly cramped den's walls. The sudden impact drove the breath from his body; he began to struggle to breathe as he felt the heavier warrior pin him down. His head was pounding and his side hurt from where the warrior drove his body into the wall.

He could fear the warrior's hot breath as he breathed into his face, and then he could feel him digging his claws into his shoulders, sending waves of pain throughout his body. He could hear the cat snicker as he suddenly removed his claws from his shoulders and swiped it rapidly down his side repeatedly. He let out a yowl of pain and felt the hot, sticky blood began to drench his side. He kicked feebly as the cat, but what his attempts were extremely weak and the cat laughed at his efforts.

Suddenly the load that was on top of him was pushed off, "Jayfeather, get up!" He heard Briarlight's frantic meow, as she stood above him, a look of intense fright in her mew.

But he didn't rise; he was actually beginning to feel very lightheaded and dizzy. And even now, he could feel an intense sense of peace overcome him, making him feel extremely exhausted and sleepy.

Though, he was quickly taken back to the present, when he heard Briarlight get knocked down only about a few tail-lengths away from him.

"Stupid she-cat!" The tom snarled her blood on his claws, "You're the first to die now." He began to approach her shaking body, and Jayfeather could feel Briarlight's frighten eyes staring back at him. But what could he possibly do to stop the raging warrior, he had already tried to attack him head on and failed, and he didn't have a doubt that he could fight right now anyway. But he had to do something, anything to protect her from him until the rest of his clan could come in to save her. He didn't even care if he lived, as long as he could save her.

So he did the only thing he could think of to do, "You're cowardly and pathetic," He meowed softly, "attacking a blind medicine cat and a crippled she-cat, how weak." He could feel the tom's gaze sift towards him.

_Good, it's working._

"How weak must you be to only fight us?"

"Shut up!" He growled, beginning to approach him again.

"You probably can't even beat a newborn kit," He continued taunting the warrior, "That's really sad."

Now the tom stood directly above him, his breath once again coming in contact with his face. He rest one of his paws on top of him and pushed down hard onto one of his open wounds. Jayfeather let out another yowl of pain as he continued pressing.

"Please, stop." Jayfeather could hear Briarlight begging the Windclan tom.

But, of course, the tom didn't listen instead resigning himself to pressing down harder. He saw savoring the torment on both him and Briarlight.

"Please," He heard Briarlight cry. He wishes he could get up and go over to comfort her, but he was, of course, trapped under this tom that seemed to want nothing more than to watch him suffer.

Suddenly Jayfeather could feel the weight removed from him again, but he could still hazily sense Briarlight laying in the exact spot the warrior had attempted to attack her in. And he could also feel the waves of surprise and hope coming off her. Dimly, he could also sense another cat was in the den with them now; he was attacking the Windclan tom. _Thank Starclan! One of the warriors finally came!_

But this warrior didn't smell of any clan cat he knew in his clan, and he, just like the aggression tom, smelt exactly of the moorland accustomed to Windclan.

"Crowfeather!" The tom growled, "What are you doing?"

_Crowfeather! My dad's the one that's rescuing me?_

"Protecting my family!" He snarled at the tom, "Now get out Boulderfur!"

"You're betraying the clan!"

"And you're betraying the warrior code by attacking and attempting to kill a medicine cat!" He snarled, "There were no orders to attack a medicine cat!"

"Breezepelt would've wanted it!"

_Breezepelt!_ Jayfeather thought hazily, remembering his half-brother in Windclan. _This cat must've been a close friend or apprentice to him! That's why he must want me dead, all of Breezepelt's hatred must've spread to this young, mislead tom_

That still didn't make Jayfeather feel any better, now he had another tom wanting him dead in Windclan, and couple that with Dawnpelt and Tigerheart, whom he was pretty sure wouldn't mind a fight with him. _Great, how could it get any worse?_

"Breezepelt's gone, Boulderfur!" Crowfeather replied, "He isn't coming back anytime soon."

"Because you drove him off!"

"No! He drove himself off when he allied with the Dark Forest. Don't you remember that Boulderfur? How he allied with the Dark Forest to destroy the clans? How he probably wouldn't have a second thought to kill you if he had to fight you?"

"He wouldn't have dared hurt me!" He spat at Crowfeather, "He would never harm me!"

"Think about it!" Crowfeather meowed, and Jayfeather could hear Bouldefur let out a screech of pain and quickly bolted out of the den.

His departure only lighten the mood slightly, as Jayfeather was still bleeding heavily from his cuts he received from the vicious tom. He could feel his sides were drenched in blood, his fur stiffened from the already drying blood. He was also beginning to feel very sleepy and any trained medicine cat knew that wasn't a good sign; it meant his body was beginning to slow down from the loss of blood. He had to fight the overwhelming feeling that was sweeping over him like a surging river; he couldn't fall unconscious or he risked the possibility of never waking up.

"Jayfeather," He could feel Crowfeather's presence besides him. "Can you hear me?"

"Loud and clear," He mumbled quietly, closing his eyes.

He felt a sharp jab on his sides, which he hope was meant to keep him awake, but in reality sent more shockwaves of pain coursing through his body. But he couldn't really complain it did do what it was meant to accomplish: waking him up.

"Sorry," his father quickly meowed, "it was the only thing I could do to keep you awake."

"Oh, Starclan, why?" He could hear Briarlight's melancholy meow, "Why did you allow that-that brute in here!"

"This isn't no time to blame anyone," Crowfeather meowed to Briarlight, "We have to stop the bleeding."

"You're- You're right," she meowed, quickly composing herself, and then dragging herself quickly over to where Crowfeather stood over Jayfeather. "Go get Leafpool, she knows more about these herbs than I do."

Jayfeather could feel uncertainness coming off of Crowfeather, but taking one last glance down at him; he agreed readily and blazed out of the den. He left Briarlight standing over his body, fear and sadness mixing together in her gaze.

"You can't leave me, Jayfeather," She meowed, her voice nearing the edge of panic, "I need you."

Even though her words were meant to encourage him to stay awake, he couldn't find the energy to. The sleepiness was overwhelming! It felt like he was laying out on a cool Greenleaf morning with a full belly.

He could feel Briarlight applying some cobwebs to his wounds, however they would only slow the bleeding until it stopped, they wouldn't put the blood he lost back into his body. She pressed down hard on them, intent on slowing the bleeding.

"Jayfeather, please don't close your eyes! Focus on me!"

Oh, how he wished he could solely focus on her and nothing else, but the serene sleepiness that engulfing him made him think that sleep was a more viable option than focusing on her. He couldn't shake off the nagging thought though, that if he fell asleep that he probably would never wake up again. But it was only the tininess of whispers, and soon it was gone; it also being replaced by the peacefulness of sleep.

And as he was about to close his eyes to enjoy the sleep that was forthcoming, he felt small wet droplets falling down onto his blood-drenched fur. How could that be possible? For, even in his blissful unawareness, he knew he was still in his den, and therefore it couldn't be rain that he was feeling. Could it be Briarlight that was crying? But why should she? He was only sleeping after all, it wasn't that bad.

"Please, wake up," Briarlight choked the words out, "I need you. I- I love you. I need you to be here for me even if you don't know that."

_What? _ He thought sheepishly. He kept thinking it repeatedly in his head. _What, What, What?_

Her words seemed to jolt him, like he was just dropped into a river while he slept. It reenergized his body slightly, and he started to try and open his eyes again; he also tried to move his body – but he was meant with a quick jab of sharp pain speed as he tried.

Dimly, Jayfeather could hear his mother and father sprint into the den. "Jayfeather!' He heard Leafpool yowl as she quickly sprinted towards him.

"He was just moving!" He heard Briarlight meow, almost sounding like she wasn't recognizing that help was here.

"That's good sign," Leafpool meowed, swiping her tongue roughly over the cuts, "he's fighting."

He could hear Leafpool bark out orders at both Crowfeather and Briarlight, but it seemed like the peaceful sleep finally won, as he could feel the calm calling of sleep finally wash over him.

* * *

He opened his eye and, much to his astonishment, he could see! He could see the thick oak trees that rose, forming the forest that he called home; he could see the lake that supplied the clans with so much; he could see all the clan's territories. The grassy moorland that formed Windclan's; the dark, almost depressing pine trees that covered almost the entirety of Shadowclan's, and the swampy territory that belonged to Riverclan, he smiled at it all. It was all so beautiful when seemed from this angle, that and he had never seemed this before. But even the beautiful sight couldn't distract him from the nagging thought of how he was seeing this all, and then it stuck him.

_I'm flying!_ He thought, looking down at his paws, and sure enough they lying on nothing but thin air.

"Beautiful, isn't it," He heard a familiar meow behind him.

"Where am I, Half Moon?" He replied, turning his head to see the white she-cat sitting before him, also floating on air.

"We're floating directly over Thunderclan territory," she replied meekly.

"I can see that, but where is here," he meowed, motioning his tail all around the air. "Am I – am I dead?" He continued, staring into her dark green eyes.

"No, you're fine. You're body just needs some time to recover from the damage it took." She answered, coming forward to rest her tail on his shoulder.

"Then why am I here?"

"You fell unconscious and it brought you here."

"Why not to Starclan like it usually does?"

She shrugged, "I wouldn't really know why, Jay's Wing. It just did. Come," she beckoned with her tail and beginning to fall down towards the ground.

Jayfeather let his mouth hang a gap as she plummeted to the ground, he was sure that she would hit it, but at the last moment she stopped and turned her head towards me. She motioned again with her tail to join her down. He gulped and did the same, which was to just will himself to the ground from the sky. He plummeted to a halt right next to Half Moon, who nodded at him and continued on through the forest.

"Hey!" Jayfeather meowed, sprinting to catch up with her. "You never said where we are going?"

"You'll see when we get there," She replied, continued with stopping.

He noticed dew hung wetly onto the leaves of the trees and other plants, which indicated that it was still early in the morning. He could hear skittering by a small mound of fallen leaves and when he turned his head towards the sound, he could see the small grey body of a mouse peak its head out, but it didn't run when they passed by it. Instead it went around its business of collecting seeds.

"Here we are," Half Moon meowed, after a little while further.

It took Jayfeather a moment to realize what he was looking at, but the crash of shock ran through him as he realized what it was. _This – this is my camp. _

The gorse tunnel hung in front of them and Half Moon pushed herself quickly through. "Wait!" He called, running after her again, "What about the battle?"

"The battle's over," She simply answered, continuing forward. "And no one can see us anyway."

Still unsure, Jayfeather pushed on uneasily. But as he entered the clearing, he could see that the cats that were in it were licking their wound. Then clearing had an uneasy scent of blood, he looked out at all the wounded cats. Brackenfur and a nasty cut running down his left flank and a set of jaw marks stabbed into his shoulders. Cherrypaw had a bunch of scratches on her head and her brother, Molepaw, seemed to be missing a claw on his right paw, but seemed to be mostly unscathed except for a couple claw swipes across his shoulder.

"Jayfeather!" Half Moon yowled. Turning his head, I saw her sticking her head out of my den, "Get over here!"

Taking one last look at the clearing, he sprinted back over to where she was. Motioning with her head to get in, she entered. Taking a deep breath, he finally plunged in. What greeted him on the inside wasn't pretty. He was lying in the middle of the den, deep claw marks lined up his flanks and blood was scattered around his body. Blood flecked his fur and his eyes remained close and his mouth a jarred. Around him was his father, Crowfeather, his mother, Leafpool, and Briarlight. Crowfeather was licking his fur, trying to remove the blood that was sticking to. Leafpool was applying a marigold poultice to his fur, and then covering it with cobwebs to hold it in place. He could see a pile of bloodied cobwebs that lied next to her. And, finally, Briarlight was lying near his head, soothingly licking it.

"Horrible isn't it?" Half Moon meowed after letting him take it all in.

"Yeah," He replied, staring more at Briarlight than himself, "The claw marks are deep."

"Not those you idiot!" She hissed, "Hers" She motioned with her nose towards Briarlight.

Briarlight had deep dark brown fur with dark amber eyes. Her forepaws were extremely well-muscled, but her back legs hung limply under her.

"It's horrible that she can never be what she truly wants, Jay's Wing," Half Moon continued, "All her life before and after the injury, she wanted to be a warrior, but she never even got the satisfaction of working as a warrior. All of her life was meaningless; she had nothing to do anymore. She's crippled. What could she do? She's useless."

"That's not true!" Jayfeather growled protectively, "She's as useful as any other cat!"

She raised a paw to quiet him, "Let me finish, please." She meowed, "She was frustrated at everything. Her mother for overprotective of her, her sister for never coming to visit her, the clan for what she perceived as pitying her. And most of all, she felt that no male cat would ever want to be mates with her, she was broken after all. All until the day you snapped at her for feeling that way and expressing it. She was shocked, maybe even angry at you for saying those things, but somewhere deep down something began to stir: love. She was beginning to feel that someone caring about her not like family, but in a different way."

"She saw past your grumpy exterior and saw you for who you truly are." She paused, "Just like I did. And that night you came back from the gathering, she saw her chance to show you her love for you, but you ignored it and stated that it was loyalty." Half Moon shook her head at him. "You were too distraught at losing me to notice, so you went on pining for me, while poor dejected Briarlight stood and watched you not returning her affection. She was beginning to give up hope and that day I told you about the she-cat that loved you, you shouted and argued with her; it left her heartbroken. Then, you came back and apologized to her and when she pressed close to you and you didn't move: she was overjoyed. Maybe her love for you wasn't in vain, maybe he truly loved me. And that's why, Jay's Wing, we're here, to see if you truly love her."

"How?"

"I'm showing you what she looks like. Could you spend the rest of your life with this crippled she-cat?"

Jayfeather looked up and down Briarlight's body: up from her deep dark amber eyes to her back legs, which sprawled out behind the rest of her body. His heart pounded as he looked at her and he felt it skip a beat when her eyes met his. She stared at him like she could see him, but he knew that wasn't the case. She couldn't see him, but it felt like she could feel his presence in the den. And before he knew what he was doing, he approached as lied next to her, resting his ethereal head on her shoulder.

"Yes, Half Moon, I could spend the rest of my days with her." He answered, "I would do anything to defend her: I'll kill any cat that tries to harm her."

Jayfeather saw Half Moon nod her head and smile at him lying protectively by Briarlight. "Very well, Jay's Wing." She meowed, "Good-bye."

And as she faded, he didn't even feel his heartbreak. And as he was beginning to lose his vision, his heart fluttered that he was finally going to be able to talk to Briarlight again, and lay his feelings out like she already has.


	6. Chapter 6

Jayfeather opened his eyes to the darkness he was akin to, but something he wasn't akin to was the aching pain that he felt in both his shoulders and sides. The pain was very sharp and stinging, it hurt every time he took in a breath, but otherwise he was alive.

"He's awake!" He heard Briarlight excited mew above his head. She dug her head into his shoulders, which sent the stinging pain through his body again. Jayfeather groaned to explain his situation to her, and she removed it and murmured an apology. "I'm sorry," lowering her voice to a whisper. "I thought I was going to lose you."

"I wouldn't dare leave." He replied, staring into where he hoped her eyes were. "You know that."

"You're awake," came Leafpool's mew from near the entrance, "Crowfeather!" She yowled to what he could only picture as to outside his den. "He's awake!"

He heard small shuffling by the den, followed by Crowfeather's familiar meow: "Thank Starclan! He's alright."

He actually sounded worried for his kin. Far from the cat, who only a couple moons ago stated his only son was Breezepelt and would've allowed his Lionblaze and Breezepelt to fight. Now, he seemed like his kits were the only thing in the forest that mattered to him, that if one of them died he would go insane with grief. He had shown the same reaction when his daughter, Hollyleaf, died in the battle with the Dark Forest.

Jayfeather felt sadness creeping up on him when he remembered Hollyleaf, his sister, dead, murdered by Hawkfrost. Her throat torn open from the tom's claws, she bled out in a matter of moments. He couldn't have done anything to save her, she bled out too quickly and the wound was too severe anyway. Nonetheless, he still felt like he should've done something – anything to save her.

"How do you feel, Jayfeather?" Leafpool meowed, worry in her tone. He could sense her leaning her head over him, peering intently into his blind eyes, protectiveness and worry radiating strongly off of her making Jayfeather feel slightly uncomfortable.

"Fantastic," he muttered in reply, trying to keep his discomfort to himself.

"How bad is the pain?"

"It feels like a comfortable breeze striking me gently in the face – How do you think it feels?" He snarled, shocked at how stupid her questions were.

"He's fine," Leafpool meowed, directing it to Crowfeather. "You know he's got your temper."

"I don't have a temper!" Crowfeather snapped.

Jayfeather pictured Leafpool smiling at his little outburst, "Whatever you say," she replied. "Now," she continued, removing the cobwebs from Jayfeather's body. He flinched slightly as she removed the sticky webs from his cuts, which sent out small shivers of pain as the cobwebs were removed. "Will you tell us why exactly one of your clan's warriors would attack a Medicine Cat?"

"Yeah, Crowfeather," Briarlight meowed, backing up Leafpool, "Boulderfur – or whatever his name was – said that Onestar told the clan to attack the Medicine Cat."

Crowfeather sighed, "What Boulderfur said was a lie," he meowed. Jayfeather could feel him glaring at him, "There were never any orders to cripple or kill the Medicine Cat; he did that solely by himself."

"Why was he so intent on killing me?" Jayfeather meowed, winching slightly as Leafpool applied some more cobwebs to his flanks, but not his shoulders. They seem to have healed just fine, as he could only feel slight discomfort from them.

"He was Breezepelt's apprentice and I guess some of his anger towards you was rubbed off on him."

"If Breezepelt wants be dead so badly, why he didn't he do it himself?"

"Because – because Breezepelt isn't a part of Windclan anymore," Crowfeather replied sadly. "Either is his mother, they both abandoned the clan after the battle with the Dark Forest."

"What?" Leafpool meowed, astonishment in her tone. "Why?"

"Obviously Breezepelt thought that everyone would treat him as a traitor – something he rightly should believe – and Nightcloud didn't want to see him leave alone, so she went with him. They haven't been scented in our territory for a while."

Jayfeather felt relieved to know that his half-brother in Windclan was actually gone. It made him feel happy to know that one problem in Windclan was resolved with Breezepelt's self-exile. He remembered the time that Breezepelt had tried to murder Poppyfrost up by the Moonpool, he had wanted him to suffer and be blamed for her death, but, luckily, he was saved with the help of Honefern, and Breezepelt was driven off. However, Breezepelt still tormented both him and his brother constantly, even going as far as to fight with Lionblaze over a thrush.

His relief didn't last long though, because he still had someone in Windclan that wanted to kill him. Boulderfur, the young tom that he had given the deathberries to earlier in the morning, had shown no fear or any sign of second thoughts about killing him. He probably would've to if it wasn't for the timely arrival of Crowfeather. Jayfeather also thought of Dawnpelt and Tigerheart, two cats who belonged to Shadowclan, who also have a strong dislike of him.

_Great,_ Jayfeather thought bitterly, _how many other cats have a grudge against me in other clans? Do I have a couple in Riverclan, who are just dying to hurt me?_

"Where is my mother and sister, Crowfeather," Leafpool suddenly inquired, worry radiating off of her pelt. "They were sent to escort those two cats back."

"I'm sorry Leafpool."

"Oh no, don't tell me their dead?" Leafpool frantic meow bordered on the edge of hysteria, sending

"No, no!" He quickly replied, "They're prisoners to Windclan now. They were captured and are probably going to use as leverage."

"Leverage? Leverage for what?" Briarlight meowed.

"I can't continue," Crowfeather replied, trying to disengage himself from the questioning. "I'll be betraying my clan than."

Jayfeather wanted to get up and strike him across the face for not showing any concern for his kin. He was simply going to let Leafpool's mother and sister remain as prisoners because he would be betraying his clan. Wasn't he already betraying the clan by attacking one of his clan mates and remaining after the battle was already over?

However, Jayfeather didn't have to do anything to Crowfeather, because he could hear Leafpool let out an angry growl.

"This is my family, Crowfeather!" She snarled, her fur bristling. "You need to tell us what this is all about! I promise whatever you say will never leave this den."

"Promise." Crowfeather meowed after a moment's consideration.

"We all promise," Briarlight answered for all of them, "We'll never say a word that is spoken."

Crowfeather sighed, "Okay," he began, "Onestar wanted to capture some prisoners because he knows Thunderclan will do anything to save or protect them, so he decided pretend that the clan was having trouble with a dog, so that they could get into the clearing. When they did and after they would leave, he knew that they would have escorts. He captured the two unfortunate she-cats and then attacked your clan to weaken it slightly, so as to help into our demands."

"That's it? You didn't even explain what your clan wants." Jayfeather growled after he had stopped speaking.

"He wants to gain more land," Crowfeather replied, "he feels that we don't have enough land to provide for our clan."

"That's mouse-brain!"Briarlight snorted, shaking her head, "You don't need any more land."

"That's what I tried to tell him, but he wouldn't listen to me, and it wasn't helped by the fact that everyone else agreed with him. They said I was still in love with you, Leafpool, so I shut up and didn't protest against it afterwards."

An awkward silence erupted after he said those words: no one spoke, and everyone seemed to be flooded in dumbfounded silence. His words were kicking in slowly in everyone; it was almost like no one could believe that he didn't do anything to help prevent this tragedy. How he could simply allow his loyalty and embarrassment cloud his judgment.

"You…you allowed this to happen because of your own embarrassment?" Leafpool meowed, after what seemed like a moon of silence.

"Please, listen…"

"No!" She growled, catching Jayfeather completely off guard with her ferocity. "Get out!"

"Leafpool…"

"Get out!" She snarled, cutting down his last, pitiful words.

Crowfeather padded slowly towards the entrance, but paused and turned his head. He hung there for a while, but when Leafpool didn't say anything to him: only offering another snarl, he left. After he left, Leafpool got up from setting Jayfeather's cob webs in place and began to pace around in circles in his den. Mixture of emotions steamed off of her, as she paced in the den; it was beginning to Jayfeather feel uncomfortable. He could also sense Briarlight feel slightly scared at Leafpool's disposition. He had to do something to get her out of his den.

"Leafpool," Jayfeather began, waiting for him to feel her eyes on him. "There are wounded in the camp you need to heal. I can't do much currently in my state, so can you go out and check on them? Brightheart might be able to help you."

Jayfeather thought she was going to retort his offer, but, to his surprise, she walked past him and proceeded to grab some supplies from his storage. She stopped for a moment to check his cob webs again and lick him on the top of his head, and then padded quickly out of the den.

His blind eyes followed her all the way out before he turned to Briarlight, his beloved, who continued to lie next to him. Her head just barely hung above his, her breath lightly tapping the top his head. Her sweet scent drifting into his nose, sending waves of euphoria throughout his body; how desperately he wished to see her once again, but that was an impossibility unless Half Moon came back one more time to show him. He closed his eyes trying to imagine her one more time from the brief glimpse he was able to get of her. He imagined her dark brown fur, dark amber eyes and her back legs sprawled uncomfortably out behind her. He tried his back to picture it, but it wasn't coming to his mind easily.

However, that wasn't the only problem he was facing currently: he was having trouble on how to show her his newfound feelings to her. He couldn't simply come out and say it to her that would be too strange. But he couldn't also just keep his feelings contain inside until the time pertained to such an occurrence. That could be many moons before such a thing happens, and he didn't want to wait that long for something like that to happen. He had to find a way to say it to her that didn't make her feel weird or strange. He thought deep back to any event involving to them, anything that could help him disclose his feelings better. He kept drawing a blank though, his mind just wasn't into the thinking capability that it usually was.

"Thank you, Jayfeather." Briarlight meowed, tearing him away from thinking any further.

"For what?" He inquired, feeling only minor pain from his sides when he spoke.

"For saving me from the Windclan cat," she answered, "Boulderfur, or whatever his name was. He could've hurt me and even kill you, but you tried your best to defend me. You were very brave for doing that."

_Here's my chance to tell her! _

"I would do anything to defend you Briarlight," He meowed, moving his body to directly face her. "I would die to defend you."

"Really?"

"I don't say these things for my health, Briarlight." Jayfeather replied, smiling. "I would hurt anyone that tried to harm you in anyway."

"Why would you die for me? I am only a simple, crippled cat. I can't help this clan anymore."

"Because you mean a lot to me, Briarlight." Jayfeather answered, "I-I love you, Briarlight."

Silence now hung in the air, the only thing audible was the breathing of both of them, as they stared at each other: blind eyes meeting seeing eyes.

"Do-do you mean it, Jayfeather?" Briarlight finally meowed, breaking the silence that followed after Jayfeather's announcement to her.

"I mean every word I've said right now, Briarlight. I love you. I need in my life."

"But you're a medicine cat, that's against the rules!"

"Sometimes rules are meant to be broken."

"But how do you know I feel the same?"

"Because you haven't said no yet." Jayfeather replied.

**I know I haven't been updating a lot recently, but what can I say writer's block sucks. It also has to do a lot with just a lack of interest in writing, not that I won't continue with any of this, but I've just moved on to doing other things at the moment with my time. It might also have to do with summer too, because now I'm able to spend time with my friends outside and simply be outside more. However, this surely isn't the end of any of these stories, I'll try to update these eventually.**


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